I’ve never been shy about voicing my displeasure against The Evil Empire. Needless to say, I was happy to fly the friendly skies instead with US Airways to a conference in Phoenix.
When I took my seat, the first thing that I noticed was how hot it was on the airplane. The second thing I noticed was how the guy sitting next to me had a nervous laugh and couldn’t keep from fidgeting with the air vent even though no air was blowing out.
There’s a long list of things that are inappropriate to say in any social setting. Those things are usually written in BOLD if your social setting is taking place on an airplane. And I’ve mentioned before how poorly I react to those socially awkward conservations.
It all came about when the guy finally got frustrated with the lack of A/C and blurted out, “I don’t why the let these planes get so hot! It’s so uncomfortable particularly since I sweat more than most people!”
How are you supposed to respond to that?
“Congratulations!”
“I’ll pray for you!”
"Please don't drip on me!"
I stuck with my standard: “So . . . uh . . . crazy weather lately, huh?”
Eventually the air kicked on and Sweat Man was able to cool off.
___________________________________________________
I had the following conversation with the flight attendant on the way back . . .
Flight Attendant: “Sir, would you care for something to drink?”
(She hands me a napkin)
Me: “Water would be great!”
FA: “Sure, that will be $2.”
(I had the napkin back)
Me: “Actually, I fine! Thanks!”
$2 bucks for water?????? It’s not even bottled!! $2 bucks for a cup of water!!!!!!
I stuck with my standard: “So . . . uh . . . crazy weather lately, huh?”
Eventually the air kicked on and Sweat Man was able to cool off.
___________________________________________________
I had the following conversation with the flight attendant on the way back . . .
Flight Attendant: “Sir, would you care for something to drink?”
(She hands me a napkin)
Me: “Water would be great!”
FA: “Sure, that will be $2.”
(I had the napkin back)
Me: “Actually, I fine! Thanks!”
$2 bucks for water?????? It’s not even bottled!! $2 bucks for a cup of water!!!!!!
You’ve got to be kidding!
__________________________________________________________
As we were beginning our decent into D/FW, I turned off my iPod and put it in the magazine pocket in front of me along with my headphones.
45 minutes later while driving through Grapevine I suddenly realized that I left them both on the plane!
AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Showing no regard for posted speed limits and/or on-coming traffic, I pulled a U-ie and raced back to the airport terminal – after all, this WAS an emergency!
Since I came in on a late flight, the baggage claim area was completely disserted when I arrived. Just as I was about vomit in my mouth at the thought of losing my iPod and noise-cancelling headphones forever I noticed the US Airways Customer Service office just as the lights were being turned off.
I rushed over and stood in the open doorway wide-eyed and panting from running across the parking lot and through half the terminal. Without my having to explain anything, the guy behind the counter gave me a look and said, “If you can tell me what song is playing when I press Play then you can have your iPod back!”
No joke!
Thank The Lord for honest airline custodians!!!
There’s plenty I can say about an airline charging me $2 for a cup of water. But I’ll let it slide since I would have had to pay plenty more to replace my iPod and headphones!
. . . but I seriously doubt I would have been able to say the same had it been The Evil Empire!
__________________________________________________________
As we were beginning our decent into D/FW, I turned off my iPod and put it in the magazine pocket in front of me along with my headphones.
45 minutes later while driving through Grapevine I suddenly realized that I left them both on the plane!
AAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Showing no regard for posted speed limits and/or on-coming traffic, I pulled a U-ie and raced back to the airport terminal – after all, this WAS an emergency!
Since I came in on a late flight, the baggage claim area was completely disserted when I arrived. Just as I was about vomit in my mouth at the thought of losing my iPod and noise-cancelling headphones forever I noticed the US Airways Customer Service office just as the lights were being turned off.
I rushed over and stood in the open doorway wide-eyed and panting from running across the parking lot and through half the terminal. Without my having to explain anything, the guy behind the counter gave me a look and said, “If you can tell me what song is playing when I press Play then you can have your iPod back!”
No joke!
Thank The Lord for honest airline custodians!!!
There’s plenty I can say about an airline charging me $2 for a cup of water. But I’ll let it slide since I would have had to pay plenty more to replace my iPod and headphones!
. . . but I seriously doubt I would have been able to say the same had it been The Evil Empire!
2 comments:
No way did you leave your iPod...so glad you found an honest person to return it! Good thing it wasn't on random play!
That's amazing that they were so honest about your iPod. As far as $2 for water, that is ridiculous!
A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached a comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... OH, CRAP!" Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!"
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